Dwarf jokes aside

Lord Of The Rings :The Two Towers is a pretty freakin' good movie. But. The first one (which, when acronym-ized into LOTR:FOTR, looks silly) had one "joke" at Gimli, the dwarf's expense. It was when Mr. big strong full height man chucked his stubby ass across a chasm, Gimli got all huffy and said "never toss a dwarf.". yeah, haha, really funny, let's get back to the uruk-hai, shall we? Anyway, that one dwarf joke excuses the dwarf "in" joke this time around, when Gimli asks Mr full height to toss him across another chasm so he can whup on the aformentioned uruk-hai. "toss me" says Gimli, regretting it before he even said it. That joke is fine, because it's a mildly funny reference to the mildly funny joke in the first movie. I'd let the movie have one more dwarf joke, that they're allowed. But no, there were something like FOUR HUNDRED more dwarf jokes. I might have missed some of the 'DWARVS ARR SHORT" grafiti scrawled on an orc's helmet or something, but there are still FAR TOO MANY DWARF JOKES IN THE NEW LORD OF THE RINGS MOVIE. At this rate, the next movie will be titled "Lord Of The Rings : Gimli Is A Short Dwarf And He's Short Ha Ha" I mean, Come now. How many times can you be funny making fun of short people? Like 7 times, that's how many. beyond that, you risk getting sued by The Altitude-Challenged Americans Network or something. There is one dwarf joke that isn't about them being short. It's about how dwarf women (also short) have beards, and can't be distinguished from the males, and are really ugly, but you'll never see them anyway, because they are barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen, where all women, and especially short ones, belong. Seriously, I don't see how they avoided being sued over that crap. It's not even funny. I am, by the way, not a dwarf. I'm 5' 8". So I'm not like, lashing out or anything.

current music: "Creepy Crawl" by Superjoint Ritual, which is one of like 40 side projects of Phil Anselmo, lead singer of Pantera.

Hey!

THIS is rad. qtvr panoramas done in macro. ever wonder what it would be like to live inside a flower or a box of screws? here's your answer.

Ich hasse Real

As if I didn't hate them enough - HERE is a link to a discussion on something I didn't even think of the last time I bitched about real.com's abomination: during the install of realplayer, you are prompted to opt-in for some truly useless spam about shit you don't care about and wouldn't read if you sought out a site that had that particular info on it, much less if it was bulkmailed to you. The problem comes when you realize there are *twelve* checkboxes, and you can only see the first 4 - but - the last 5 are checked. So those of you who didn't bother to scroll down will be bombarded by spam that you technically signed on for. Those worthless bastards. The next step, I predict, will be to make the free realplayer totally ad-served, meaning it will play an ad (loaded off some overloaded and slow server) every time you play a file, online or not. Man, I hate real networks more every day.

current music: "Feuer Frei" by Rammstein, which explains the german topic. I don't understand a word these guys say, but I like it.

Jackin' for beats

And even if ya down with my crew - I'll jack them too.

The news of my death has been pretty much spot on.

I am posting from the great state of Illinois. whee. I live in Spauldo's basement, which is cool. Not really a whole lot to say, really, except that I think you should go check out Homestar Runner Strong Bad is cool.



Current Music: "House of the rising sun", only it's the live version by oysterhead. Oysterhead being les from primus and the guy from phish.

Stuck in my head: "Jacking for beats" by Ice Cube, of all things... I remember liking the video, tho.