The Complete Service Toilet Store (plumbing fixtures, sexual deviance)

I figured out long ago how I could make a stable living in a market that will never dry up: I could sell toilets. See, *everybody* needs a toilet, at some point. Every house has at least one, and barring some rapid evolution or invention of a new way to remove waste from the home - the toilet is here to stay. There are a very small number of people who don't use them, of course - people living in the mountains who think toilets have transmitters in them so the CIA will know what you eat, and people who, for medical reasons, go in a bag they carry around with them. I know selling toilets isn't glamorous, and I know that people don't just get up one day and go "hey - I think we oughta buy a toilet!", but I think toilets are just about the most stable market there is, short of maybe toilet paper. Of course, if I really wanted to make money, I could film porn on the side. Porn involving toilets. And hermaphrodites. I'm not sure why, but for some reason, a few years ago, the porn industry as a whole decided that girls peeing was sexy. I don't get it. I see nothing at all sexy about a girl taking a leak - not even the voyeur side of it - peeking in a window or something. I can't wrap my brain around what people would find appealing about watching other people urinate. Now, drinking pee, I can see. There's a real obvious dom/sub relationship when you tinkle in somebody's mouth. But just seeing somebody go... I don't get it. I think it was about the same time that the industry (I'm good friends with the porn industry, so I can just call it "the industry, like I'm in the know) decided that guys like women with penises. I think I get this one. I think the industry knows that a lot of guys have those dark urges to try out what their upbringing tells them is taboo: fucking another dude. So there have been ads for some time in the back of porn mags and stuff with pics of guys offering phone sex. These things were aimed, ostensibly, at gay and bi men, but the fact that they appeared in straight porn mages otherwise filled with pics of women taking dick means they obviously played at guys who wanted to try it, but didn't want to actually go find a guy. I think the chicks with dicks ads are the same thing: A guy sees a woman - guys are *supposed* to be having sex with women - that's fine. If "she" has a cock - that's not really technically a guy, right? I mean, just because this woman has a dong and you fuck her in the ass after she gives you a BJ doesn't make you gay, right? Truth is: those pics are either doctored, or the women were. See, there have been maybe 5 actual hermaphrodites in recorded history. An actual woman who just happens to have a dick doesn't exist. Those "women" are in fact guys, gay guys usually, who are taking estrogen and had boob jobs. Which means that were you to actually encounter one of these people in a sexual manner, you would in fact be having sex with a guy, with tits and a girl haircut. But apparently guys don't see it that way, since it seems 2 out of 10 phone sex ads in the back of those magazines has a tranny in the picture. So my toilet business would make extra money making films of tstv's pissing on guys on the toilet. And I suppose I could sell a clear acrylic one to the paranoid guy in the mountains. And maybe if I sold colostomy bags and diapers, I could cover 100% of all people. The complete service toilet store.